What would you do to experience something truly Beautiful?
To touch, see, hear, smell and breathe in a moment, a single moment so intense and full of Awe and Wonder that you could cry. An experience that challenges what you thought it meant to be alive and your understanding of real.
Would you leave your home, your family, your friends, that one girl whose very name fills you with Joy and rescues you from sorrow? For just a chance at something greater than yourself.
Would you be prepared to die?
I have been asking myself that question over and over again lately. Would I be prepared to die? I have already left my home, family, friends, even that girl who made me smile. But those things I will return to, those actions are reversible. Yet there is finality to death that is inescapable, the end of your hopes, your dreams, a moment that renders those reversible actions irreversible.
I think of the risk of losing everything, of not seeing the ones I love again, of not seeing the places I want to see, or do the things I want to do. To leave nothing behind but a memory and an unfulfilled promise to make a change in the world.
I think about these things, but something frightens me even more.
What if I didn’t live at all? What if I was so struck by this fear of dissolving into nothing that I never took any risks? That I traded life for simply existing and spent my years trapped in the same routine. Never experiencing anything new, never growing, never moving, until one day sickness, an accident or old age took me.
I could fool myself, under the illusion that i am safe. That if i stay home, go to school and university and take that stable 9-5 job afterwards I will have a comfortable life, and I will survive. Well maybe, maybe I will survive. I might even reach over a hundred and see my kids and grandchildren grow up to do the same.
But what am i saving myself from?
Why would i be content with survival? For me living is more important. I want to live my life, not survive it. And it seems to me the only way to do that, is to take risks. To put myself in uncomfortable situations, go places I want to go and do the things I want to do, regardless of what others say.
A lot of the time people will realise the thing that terrified them before is no more dangerous than driving your car to work, yet infinitely more rewarding. What it really comes down to is am i prepared to die happy in search of adventure and experience. Or am i content to wait until death catches up to me and realise that yes, I existed, but did I ever really live?
I do not have a death wish and at least I don’t think I am insane, but I am willing to risk my life for a chance to be alive!
“The wise man does not expose himself needlessly to danger, since there are few things for which he cares sufficiently; but he is willing, in great crises, to give even his life – knowing that under certain conditions it is not worthwhile to live.” – Aristotle
So what would you be wiling to die for? would love to hear what you think in the comments below and feedback is always appreciated.
p.s. sorry for the delay.
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